Wednesday, February 11, 2009

Wait and See

This past Saturday my relationship finally blew up (literally, he stormed out of the bedroom and the house) at this point I was pushed past the point of caring about his feelings and for once decided that the cold unvarnished truth about the differences in our physical needs had to come out (no pun intended) and be discussed and resolved, so on Sunday when he started to give me the obligatory apology for what happened Saturday night I insisted on knowing specifically what he thought he should be sorry for, and of course he was apologizing for the wrong thing. The greatest hindrance to a relationship is miscommunication, so this time instead of being quiet I spelled it out for him -- step up or we should not be together. Don't get me wrong he is a great guy but we are completely different when it comes to sex (he is more vanilla and I am.....not). Going on the premise that perhaps I had been unclear as to my needs I proceeded to spell them out, which basically translates to this philosophy "if you do not want an open relationship, then you need to figure out how to meet my needs and if you cannot then we need to not be together". The thought of another ending makes me sad, but the thought of letting this go on until I hurt him so much that he ends up hating me is not acceptable.

The bottom line regarding relationships is this "I do not understand how, if you are in a relationship with someone who has been honest with you about their needs and you really do love them, can you not do everything in your power to make that person happy to be with you?

So the end result for me (after the discussion this weekend) was that only time will tell if he really is willing and able to step it up so that we can be happy together, if not then once again (and for the last time) I will be looking for a place to live, so for now I will wait and see.......

Have a blessed day and a better tomorrow

TTFN

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